the 3 v’s


By Alan Jones, Two’s Company Training Manager

Dated: 19th February 2020

Have you ever said something, but it was taken in the wrong way?

It’s all about being consistent with our words, voice and body language.

We should ensure that our voice and body language all reflect what we are saying and therefore project a single message of uniformity. There have been many studies on this, with academics finding that where there seemed to be an inconsistency between words, tone of voice and body language, we would tend to read their meaning in the following way:-

  • 7% of meaning is what we say (Verbal)
  • 38% of meaning is how we say it (Vocal)
  • 55% of meaning is our body language (Visual)

Whoever you are talking to must have confidence in what you are saying and is receiving the message that you THINK you are delivering!

Our own individual mood can have a huge impact on how we say things. Understanding what can have a negative impact on our mood, will help us to recognise when we may be subconsciously vocalising in a different way to how we intend.

10% of conflicts are due to difference in opinion, 90% are due to wrong tone of voice!

Ask yourself, what affects your mood and therefore your tone of voice? Could it be any of the following …………

I LOVE cold weather and somehow, it gives me more energy and generally makes me happier. However, if you put me in a hot environment, I am miserable. I know this can translate into my vocalisation and give the wrong impression that is intended.

I am very much aware of this and therefore I am able to adapt and ensure I am consistent with my words, voice and body language and that they are all delivering the same message.

Within our courses we include real life scenarios to get our groups thinking about how they come across in certain situations and what can have an effect on their tone of voice on a daily basis. We look at different types of mood, how this translates into our tone and affects how we say things and how we manage this within our daily working lives.

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